You can’t imagine it, the singer remarks. At that moment gearing up for her new album launch in eight years, deeply enamored with her newish partner, and at long last the parent to a young child after facing fertility challenges for ten years, on top of the world. Then in spring she was told she had breast cancer.
The musician, actual name Jessica Cornish, is renowned for speaking her mind. The album, her latest release, was supposed to be an open book, addressing every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last made an album (endometriosis, losing a baby, failed relationships, emotional abuse, suicide) with her usual frankness. The first single, No Secrets, was dropped in April. But by then there remained a major undisclosed truth. Her diagnosis. Then second single, her song Living My Best Life, was released in May and Cornish was giving interviews about how she was living her best life, while at the same time living with breast cancer. Subsequently she shared the news, and in early July she had a mastectomy.
She shoots me her best “What the fuck?” look. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m doing every media appearance, and they inquire, ‘Any updates?’ and I respond, ‘Erm, yeah, nothing …’” Cornish has just had to call off performances because she’s awaiting reconstructive surgery.
We’re at a studio in the capital. She is sporting a beige fake-leather jacket, denim trousers with ornate white designs, cream boots and big frames. Picture motorcycle style meets 70s singer aesthetic. “As if I’m in the 1970s and I should have a man with facial hair.” Like the film, I say, thinking of the picture. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She beams. Jessie is quick, bold and filter-free. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is planning to attempt her standup debut soon. “I enjoy humor. On stage I basically roast the crowd.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
She was preparing for an appearance at the ceremony when she discovered a mass. “I immediately went to get it looked at, had an scan, and they were, like, ‘It looks like nothing; your breasts are normal.’ And I responded, ‘But I can feel it. I’ve got an achy arm and numbness in my fingers whenever I get up.’ And they said, ‘We should biopsy it?’ The date was March 28, the following my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The doctor told her if it was serious she’d call on the start of the week. By then she had persuaded herself it was okay. The way she describes it, it was simply too inconvenient to get cancer when she had a busy schedule.
“It was a fortnight prior from debuting the project after a long hiatus and no new music. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I was, like, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I join the call believing it’s all going to be positive, and she informs me, ‘Please take a seat.’ The solemn tone? And she says, ‘I regret to inform you but your biopsy results have indicated aggressive cancer.’” What was your reaction? “I answered, ‘Oh, that’s not ideal, is it?. The timing is terrible.’ My initial thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”
Some men find me challenging due to my self-awareness
She viewed the procedure frightening and surreal. “I fear going under. They lead you. You know when you have emergency surgery you are wheeled, but now I just walked with a hospital gown and my rear exposed. It felt surreal.” But, she notes, she’s been lucky. Without chemo or radio, just the surgery. “It’s terrible, but however I’m grateful it was caught soon. The surgery happened a few months back and my one side now appears as a fruit under fabric.” A further beam. “I got to keep the nipple, though.”
The next operation is therapeutic and aesthetic. Her boobs, she observes, are now “uneven. They didn’t do an implant as small as my original. How rude! I felt, don’t add insult to injury, I’m already having a hard period. How offensive! Amusingly I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be ideal. My plans were disrupted.”
A History of Health Challenges
Cornish is accustomed to medical issues. She feels her attitude toward illness has been so optimistic because she’s used to physical challenges. Frequently they align with peak moments, functioning as a wake-up call, or shock, to highlight not to assume everything is fine. “Truly, I feel the universe whispers, ‘You having a good time? Hold on.’ Since childhood, it has always gone alongside high points for me; a major or strange event has happened to my health.”
She takes me back to her 11-year-old self, already beginning starring in the West End in the production (she was cast at the age of nine). That’s when she was found to have the medical problem a syndrome, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as lightheadedness and heart flutters. “I rehearsed between visits on an IV drip, and being readmitted at night.” She skips forward six years, and young Jessica has joined the girl group Soul Deep while studying at the academy. “I secured a deal, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was ready to debut in 2020 I had a collision and my voice box shifted and I lost my voice for a twelve months.”
Hey, I say, slow down, I am overwhelmed. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees
